Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Obituary

I have been procrastinating my blog for today. I was going to post "Kooper's story" that I have been working on for a few weeks now. I just don't want to "publish" it yet. I needs some reviewers to make sure it makes sense. It does to me, but I feel like even if I reread it 10 times I will see the same thing when someone else might see that it actually doesn't make sense..if that made any sense. Plus I want Ryan to read it first.

But while writing his story it reminded me about Kooper's obituary or actually the obituary he never had. When he was born and the question of weather to do one or not came up my immediate and first response was not to because I don't even read the obituaries, especially the ones from the Arizona Republic. I didn't even get a newspaper at the time. I figured I didn't know very many people in Arizona and those that I would want to tell about Kooper would be the ones that would know because they know me. Little did I know that my feelings would be the opposite. I want everyone to know about my sweet little boy. Now looking back I wish I would have done one. To tell the world or Arizona about my son. It is one of my biggest regrets along with not doing hand or feet molds. I don't ever remember seeing a stillborn obituary in the paper growing up so I just thought that people didn't do it. Sadly now, I have seen too many in the papers. When I read them my heart breaks for the family.

I really wish I would have done one. Here is a little something that Ryan's Mom wrote for Kooper. It was in his program for his funeral service.

Baby Kooper Leland Perry, whose only world was in Mommy's womb, entered our lives on July 11, 2008. Our Heavenly Father has you now. We only held you for a little while, but during that time you changed our life forever. You were so perfect. We were able to see your face, hold your close and tell you we love you. We will forever miss you and as life goes on, you will always be part of our heartbeat.

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4 comments:

Kendra said...

That is so beautiful Kami. Your blog is so much better than anything you could have posted in the newspaper. It's a constant reminder of your little angel. The people who love you, and the people who will be led to your blog appreciate you and your family, and everything you have endured. Keep writing. You continue to be an inspiration, and Kooper will never be forgotten.

amyraye said...

Kami- I'm so happy that you started this process. I would be happy to read Kooper's story from an outsider's perspective so i can ask questions and help empty out the contents of your memory. for me, it was easiest to just write down the pieces i could remember, whether they were chronological or complete sentences or not. i know it's an emotionally draining process, but i agree with kendra: it's your tribute to kooper- and better than an obituary could be. good luck. and feel free to e-mail me. i am anxious to hear kooper's story.

Nicki said...

kami, it is crazy to think that we are the same age. You are such a great mom to your kids. I love to read your blog and It helps me to be thankful for more in my life and to know that things are how they are supost to be at this time. I agree with you with the obituary I never read anything like that but it always works out the when something happens you see thing more and differently. My little boy was born a month after Kooper. You are amazing person. P.S. I suck at spelling!

Cori White said...

that is sweet.. i felt the same about the obituary never seeing a stillborn in there.. not that i ever remember reading them anyway..
Thanks for your thought and feelings and what your mom wrote was very sweet!