Sunday, August 29, 2010

Trials are blessings

The only drawback with going to church with a baby and toddler not yet old enough for nursery is that it seems like you are always in the halls. Today was a pretty hectic day at church. Kamryn was restless and ready for a nap. Keegan woke up so I had someone holding him while I chased Kamryn through the halls. Then later on in the last bit of church Keegan was brought back to me with a huge blowout going all up his back...Good thing I remembered his blanket today! So he hung out in a diaper and blanket for the rest of church.

I did enjoy the Sunday school lesson (the whole 5 minutes I was in there). It was on trials or something like that. They were talking about how some grow stronger and some turn the back the to the Lord after a trial. Some would ask the Lord what have I done to deserve this? The sweet lady who took care of Keegan for me made a comment about the topic . I don't have her exact words but this is what I remember her saying, "Every trial is a blessing and every blessing is a trial. You have to take a blessing (trial)and ask Heavenly Father what he wants us to learn from it. We weren't put here on earth to lay around and read magazines and let the maid do all the work. We are here to grow"

I can relate to that so much. I have had a very hard trial with losing Kooper. I was lucky to let that trial help me grow closer to my Heavenly Father. Don't get me wrong I wondered, What did I do to deserve this? Why is this happening to me? Why me? Over and over. But those words above that this sweet lady said reminded me why we have trials. I am here to grow to have blessings (trials) so that I can grow and become a better and stronger person. It's not always fun to have these kind of blessings but I am grateful for my faith that helps me get through them. There are still days I am sad or just want my baby but I have come along way. I have grown. There are fewer bad days, but that doesn't mean I don't think about Kooper on the good days. He is always on my mind and in my heart. I love and miss that boy! I wanted to go to the cemetery today to take in him new flowers, but I didn't have any new flowers for him so hopefully this week I will be able to go out there.


1 comment:

Marissa said...

If anything good can be said about losing our babies - at least for me - and apparently you - it has made us both stronger and better people. Not that we wouldn't change it in a second but it is what it is and I know I've grown because of it.