Excuses

I have been pregnant for quite a while now. Of course there were breaks between these three pregnancies but sometimes I forget what it feels like to not be pregnant. I have realized that there are a few perks/excuses that pregnant people get like:

• I have an excuse to have a belly.
• I have an excuse to be forgetful...it's true pregnancy and kids cause memory loss!
• I have an excuse for sleeping in late or being sleepy.
• I have an excuse not to clean the shower. Too much chemicals with not enough ventilation.
• I have an excuse to get a pedicure once I get so far along in the pregnancy (I am getting to that point) It's tough to bend over when there is a hard mass in your tummy. For men out there stick a basketball in your shirt and try and touch your toes....that's how it feels!
• I have an excuse why I haven't been running (even though I want to be).
• I have an excuse to sit down in a crowded place without feeling bad for those standing waiting for a seat around me.
• I have an excuse for taking the most comfortable seat at a work meeting.
• I have an excuse not to lift the heavy things.
• I have an excuse to cry or bawl over things and not look silly. For example, we were at Culver's on Friday. For example they showed a replay a million times of a last second winning shot in a college basketball game and the shot was from almost half court...the guy made it. I cried...I told Ryan that was a miracle shot and there must be a reason why they made it. I know stupid and silly. I had chills and everything! haha
• I have an excuse to eat a little more, or often...like during church. It doesn't look as bad that I am eating Kade's Fruitloops during church when I am pregnant.

I can't think of anymore right now, but feel free to add your own in my comments. I would love to hear them.

I enjoy being pregnant. There are some things that aren't fun about being pregnant but they are definitely worth sacrificing for the end reward. I love my kids. I am thankful for a fertile body that has never had to try hard to get pregnant. My heart aches for those that have a hard time. I imagine that it is one of the most frustrating and possibly heartbreaking trials that someone can go through. I wish getting pregnant was as easy for them as it is for me. Although they probably have other things in life that are easy for them that are hard for me. I know God planned and knows are trials and they are only there to help us grow.

Kids, Target and Barbies

I love to hear Kade's take on different things. It is fun to listen to him talk. It really helps you realize how his brain works and see things from his almost 5 year old perspective. It's funny because whenever he sees something cool that he wishes Ryan or I had, he asks, "Do you want me to get you that for your birthday?"

He is becoming much more polite and is listening to me ALOT better, especially in public. He apologizes for things without me telling him to. It is getting easier to take him places.


It's funny because sometimes he will just randomly tell me something that happened at preschool. He really like to play with a girl named Carly. Whenever I asked him who he played with that day he tells me her name first. He also just says alot of funny random things.


Kamryn is getting faster and faster at crawling but I can tell that she hates it. She has rug burn on her knees and they are red, it doesn't help that much even with pants. She hates to crawl on the tile too. As soon as she reaches it she is crawling on her hands and feet and crying the whole time. I have a feeling as soon as she gets this walking thing down she will be off those knees. She loves to walk while holding your hands I have even put her up to her walker/stroller toy and she pushes that and walks with it. I have to help because she tends to lean on it and I am afraid she is going to push it right out from under her! I will have to get a picture sometime when Ryan gets home.

Today we went to my favorite store Target and walked around. My favorite spots to go when I go to Target are:

Dollar section at the front of the store.

Baby section

Office supplies

Ends of the isles where are the clearance items are

Doll/Barbie isle



Well when I was walking down the Barbie isle I found this Barbie that reminded me of my childhood. I am pretty sure it was my sisters because when it came out I wasn't even old enough to know what a Barbie was. The dress she is wearing was always one of my favorites to dress my Barbie in. It's kind of sad that they want $45.00 for it. Who would pay that much for a Barbie?

The "Party Store" and Concrete Mixers..YUM!

Today was a pretty nice day. I am exhausted as usual. Kade was begging me to take him to "the party store". His birthday is coming up and we were talking about party themes and I pulled up Party City online and we looked at a few things online and I told him I would take him to the store. So we went and I snapped a few fun pictures. I had to bribe him to let me take his picture. He got a sucker when we left! haha

Diego and Dora!

I had to hold Kamryn's mask on because she kept ripping it off!

Then we met Ryan for dinner at Culver's. YUMMY! The Culver's by Ryan's work is so much better at their Concrete Mixers than the one by our house. It's not just the person making them either. Everytime I have gotten one from the one by Ryan's work every bite has candy in it, which I LOVE! And I don't even ask for extra topping. EVERTIME I order one from the one by my house...and say "extra snickers" I always end up a bunch of ice cream and a few pieces of candy. So from now on I think I will just refuse to get ice cream from the Culvers by my house.

Anyways dinner was yummy and I am tired! I'm off to bed!

Picnic at the park

Today after preschool I took the kids for a picnic at the park. Kamryn has a new love for grass. She was so fascinated by it. She just kept rubbing her hand back and forth over it. As soon as Kade was done with his lunch he was off playing with kids. I started to clean up and a little boy walked up to me and just stared. His Mom came over a few minutes later with her 6 other kids in tow. She told me that her little boy said he wanted to say hit to the pretty baby. So Kamryn had 5 kids oohing and awwing over her. She thought it was the best thing ever. She just laughed and smiled and patted her hands on her legs and was so excited to have so much attention. She even started to babble a little. I don't think she has had that many kids all around her staring at her. The other 2 kids were smaller and in the stroller asleep. One of them probably around the age of 7 just picked her up and wanted to carry her. It was kind of strange. She asked me how many kids I had. I lied...well a white lie. I said two. I honestly didn't feel like opening up to all these kids and their Mom. The whole thing was kind of an uncomfortable situation. I kind of felt ashamed for not mentioning Kooper, like I betrayed him. I am sure he could care less and I am sure he understands. After I said two I wanted to change my mind. I didn't say anything, I just stared at this women in amazement with all 7 of her children...she was going to the grocery store, with all of them...I think the oldest one was probably 10, and the youngest was 6 months, you do the math. I thought...wow that could be me, then I thought again and said to myself, Not in a million years! haha. I get teased by my family about being pregnant 3 years in a row. My dad calls me Louise...that's his Mom's (my grandma's) name. She had 9 kids. I don't' know how close in age they are but I know a few of them are pretty close in age. He also teases me about watching 19 kids and Counting. He tells me I better stop!

I don't know what it is about being pregnant, it causes me anxiety at times, and worry, but feeling your baby kick is one of the best things in the world. I think mostly it reminds me of Kooper. That was the only time I got to really spend with him. So I enjoy the feeling of being pregnant as long as I am not sick. I don't know what it is about those little babies, it would be a lot easier if they didn't grow so fast! About a month ago I saw a little 4 week old when I dropped Ryan off at work and just wanted to hold her in my arms. They grow too fast. I am sure God made it that way so that we would have more than one!

Only I am not getting pregnant anytime soon. Believe me. My body needs a break! I won't officially say this will be our last because I don't want to go back on my words, but lets just say it will definitely be at least a few years away!

Obituary

I have been procrastinating my blog for today. I was going to post "Kooper's story" that I have been working on for a few weeks now. I just don't want to "publish" it yet. I needs some reviewers to make sure it makes sense. It does to me, but I feel like even if I reread it 10 times I will see the same thing when someone else might see that it actually doesn't make sense..if that made any sense. Plus I want Ryan to read it first.

But while writing his story it reminded me about Kooper's obituary or actually the obituary he never had. When he was born and the question of weather to do one or not came up my immediate and first response was not to because I don't even read the obituaries, especially the ones from the Arizona Republic. I didn't even get a newspaper at the time. I figured I didn't know very many people in Arizona and those that I would want to tell about Kooper would be the ones that would know because they know me. Little did I know that my feelings would be the opposite. I want everyone to know about my sweet little boy. Now looking back I wish I would have done one. To tell the world or Arizona about my son. It is one of my biggest regrets along with not doing hand or feet molds. I don't ever remember seeing a stillborn obituary in the paper growing up so I just thought that people didn't do it. Sadly now, I have seen too many in the papers. When I read them my heart breaks for the family.

I really wish I would have done one. Here is a little something that Ryan's Mom wrote for Kooper. It was in his program for his funeral service.

Baby Kooper Leland Perry, whose only world was in Mommy's womb, entered our lives on July 11, 2008. Our Heavenly Father has you now. We only held you for a little while, but during that time you changed our life forever. You were so perfect. We were able to see your face, hold your close and tell you we love you. We will forever miss you and as life goes on, you will always be part of our heartbeat.

Baby update and A Baby Story

My doctors appointment went well today. No new baby news. I will now be going bi-weekly and I had to move my ultrasound, so no ultrasound this week. So nothing new to report other than even though I agreed to name him Keegan I am struggling with it. I don't know if anyone else has noticed, but I don't call him by his name. I have a hard time calling him Keegan. This morning when I got home from my appointment and Ryan said, "How's Keegan doing?" I closed my eyes and laughed and told him my honest feelings...that I just have a hard time with the name and I don't love it. Well he told me his honest opinion and told me that he didn't love Krue. Today Kade called him both names....which was weird. I guess his name isn't set in stone until he is born and I have filled out the paperwork.

On another note I was watching A Baby Story this morning while Kade was at preschool. I don't watch it very often and I have had a hard time watching it since Kooper. It has become easier but some stories just end up making me angry or bothered (like the one I watched today) and I wonder why I even bothered to watch in the first place! Today there was this couple having their first baby. They were in a hospital in New York (I actually had to look at the end of the show because is says "A special thanks to BLANK for letting us film" or something like that to thank the hospital.) I wondered if it was a hospital or a birthing center. It indeed was a hospital but it sure didn't look like one during the show. I wasn't aware that Labor and Delivery rooms at some hospitals look like a triage room in another. I don't consider the hospital I have delivered my babies at to be high class or anything like that so I don't know what kind of hospital this was but I would have chosen somewhere else. Not only did it look like a triage room or the size of one for that matter, I don't even know how to describe it. In all the shows (which I have seen alot) about babies being born this was not like any of the L&D Rooms I have seen. Anyways back to the story. This Mom had a natural birth plan. She did a lot of laboring at home and then was in extreme pain so they went to the hospital because she wanted some relief and her contractions were getting close. So they get there and she is only dilated to a 2. She is throwing up and sick and all she wants is an epidural. She said in the car I am changing my birth plan, I can't handle the pain I want something for it. Well the doctor and nurse at this hospital said that they were ordering the epidural but told her they were trying to hold off to see if she could just make it through it and possibly change her mind. Her jerk of a husband also said, " I think you should just try and keep going, your labor will go faster without the epidural and I know you will regret it." That man couldn't stand half the pain that women was going through. All I could think of is, someone should kick him where it counts and ask him if he wished he had an epidural right now!

HELLO this is her first baby, she is in extreme pain, even without the epidural this could go on for HOURS! For 2-3 hours she labored with no epidural and the whole time kept asking for it. If my nurse or doctor told me that I would have gone MAD! haha

So finally after the hours of laboring they check her...she is dilated to a 7. She even commented how she wished they would have given her something, even knowing how far she went. They finally gave her the epidural and then when it came time to push they had to encourage her so much and she still had barely enough energy to get the baby out. Probably because she was tired from laboring so long. On top of it all at the end the baby's heart rate was dropping and come to find out (they didn't say anything about it on the show but you could see it) there was meconium...meaning at some point the baby pooped while he was in there due to stress. They didn't address the meconium or even talk about why or when the baby was in distress. Anyhow after that I was just like you all are a bunch of idiots! When I ask for an epidural you better just get me one and the only excuse I will accept is that the anaesthesiologist is BUSY!

Okay I am done with my "rant" about A Baby Story.

Someone made a comment or I guess posted a question in my comments about if I had decided on the baby's room decor or theme. Well unfortunately for this baby he doesn't get his own room for now. So I haven't really decided about crib bedding. Right now we live in a 3 bedroom home. We have a "den" that is the playroom, which could be converted into a bedroom but it would require closing off the wall and creating a doorway and it wouldn't' have a closet. This could be an option.

Ryan suggested putting him in Kamryn's room, which is PRETTY and PINK. I said NO. I am not against sharing rooms, but I think that they would be better off sleeping in separate rooms especially during nap time! I am mostly leaning towards putting him in Kade's room once he is sleeping in a crib. For the first little while he will be in a bassinet in our room. Kade always wants someone to sleep with him. Probably because for the longest time he crawled into bed with us in the middle of the night. That has changed and he longs to have a buddy. So once the baby is sleeping well I will put him in the same room as Kade.

Kade's room is a Harley Davidson themed room. I still have Kade's old crib bedding (which is sports themed) but we will see if I use it. I doubt I could find something to match this Harley theme....maybe someone could help me with a sewing project?! I have a machine but not alot of knowledge.

Cooking Dinner

Those who know me know that I don't like to cook (that is putting it nicely). I don't mind baking, but cooking dinner is something I have really been trying to work on. Now that Ryan has been working a little later I don't "cook" dinner that often. I just make something quick for Kade and I. I have an especially hard time fixing dinner on Sundays and Mondays due to my work schedule. I have no motivation. usually Ryan steps in and really helps out and I LOVE that about him. He is always willing to help and usually offers to make dinner. Like tonight...he made us some yummy chicken rice and gravy. One of our family favorites! It's the easiest meal EVER! The worst part about tonight is that tomorrow morning I have to take my glucose test at the doctor to test for gestational diabetes (YUCK!). Since it is first thing in the morning and on the instructions I am not supposed to have any sugar the day of the test I figure I probably shouldn't have any sugar tonight. So I was lucky to have a nice filling meal to curb my craving and love for SWEETS! Although I am VERY full....after that dinner all I really want is something sweet.

Thanks hunny for a yummy meal! I really appreciated it!