4th of July!

My hottie hustband!

Cute little SaraJane! We can't call her "Baby Jane" anymore! She is such a cutie and when her face is not covered in cake she looks just like her Mommy!

Jenna made the cute bow and bracelet! Thanks Jenna!

And of course I had to find a picture where you get to see her whole outfit!

We hope everyone had a wonderful and safe 4th of July. Ours was a blast. We spent the day with friends not only celebrating our Independence but celebrating SaraJane's 1st Birthday! Kade had fun playing with his buddy Sumner and Landon and met a new friend named Ryan. It is amazing how fast this past year has gone by. I can't believe that SaraJane is 1! I don't know if the first few weeks of July will always be such a mixture of emotions for me. SaraJane and Kooper were supposed to share a birthday (according to Jenna and I). We had it all planned out. Jenna made a video of SaraJane's first year and seeing the pictures of her birth brought back many memories of what I have lost and the birth story that I wish I had. The turnout that I wish would have been the case for Kooper. I know that God has a plan for me and my family and I can't change his plan and that there was nothing that I could do. The experience has made me a better person and who I am today.

I love SaraJane so much, she has a special place in my heart.

This first week of July has already been a roller coaster of emotions for me. I keep going back to a year ago and what was happening then. I wish so bad that things would have turned out different. Even if Kamryn were still going to be here now, I wish that I had both of them here with me. I miss my sweet baby boy so much and I wish he were here. I am so lucky to have my family and I am grateful for them. I am grateful for Kamryn and her sweet spirit that has joined our family.

Flashback from a year ago....we went to visit RD, Jenna and SaraJane after she was born!

If my post sounds a little sad or depressing to anyone don't worry about me. I am just posting my true feelings and I have a right to be sad or depressed at times, especially at this time of year. It is normal. I am a Mother who is coming up on a special milestone. I don't know how I will feel or react on his birthday, but hopefully it is peace. I want to celebrate that he is part of our family and we are forever a family!