I wish I could push record sometimes and remember the exact conversation I just had with someone. Especially my kids and especially my husband so I can prove him wrong and be RIGHT (can you tell I love to be right?)!
On Saturday we were on our way to the outlets that are about 45 minutes from our house and Kade asks me from the back seat. "Is Kooper going to come live with us again?" I can't exactly remember how our conversation went. This was one of those times I wish I could rewind and look back on his questions and my answers in hope that I answered them the way I would have wanted to. He asked me if Kooper would be all better and if his lips would be yellow (not sure where he got this from. One of his pictures his lips look more yellow)? I told him that one day when Jesus comes again that everybody that died is going to get their body back and their body will be all better. Kade asked me if Kooper would come home with us and I told him that Kooper would be with us again but only if we are good and choose the right. He also asked if he would be able to hold his little brother and I teared up and told him yes, you will get to hold your brother. That made him so happy. It made me so happy thinking about the day that I will get to hold him in my arms again.
I miss him so much! I still ache to hold him and ache for all the things that I am missing out on, all I can do is look at the eternal perspective and know that if I do what is right and keep the commandments that I will get to hold and raise him one day. Until then I will just have to hold my other kids and raise them to the best of my ability.